News from the Pool: Marred Bliss

Today I neared glory at poolside, striding through Tom: The Unknown Tennessee Williams while sunning. I also caught up on the local gossip concerning people I have never seen. The best is transcribed below. This post's subtitle is borrowed affectionately from playwright Mark O'Donnell's one-act containing Jane's memorable line: "Oh honey, just stink. In less than forty eight horrors we will be moan and woof! Isn't it amassing?"

(Scene: two young women sunning, one of whom has just entered.)
Susie: You'll never guess what Gossard did last night.
Kate: Tell me. Was it at the bar?
Susie: Yeah, we were all drinking, and he'd been really sweet with Beth, and they both got just totally trashed.
Kate: Okay...?
Susie: And then we were all sitting there and we heard Gossard on the PA, proposing.
Kate: No way.
Susie: And then he did it again at the table, collapsing to one knee.
Kate: Whoa. They're not getting married. Kate was just talking the other day about how he would be leaving town and she might follow him later, when the time was right.
Susie: Well, but she was drunk.
Kate: She said yes?
(Susie nods)
Kate: Holy shit, I can picture it now, how Gossard would propose, "Yo, everybody, this is Gossard and I got a announcement and all. Beth, I want you to marry me. Okay, thanks everybody. Go IU!"
Susie: So then apparently Mark comes up to Gossard today and was like, "Hey, congratulations man." And Gossard just looked at him a minute and said, "Why?"
Kate: No way.
Susie: Yeah, and when Mark reminded him of what he'd done last night, he said, "Oh yeah, uhh, thanks I guess."
Kate: Hasn't Gossard been engaged before?
Susie: Yup.
Kate: Beautiful.


Jane: And now we're encaged! I can hardly wait till we're marred!